Difficult people

I have a certain person at my work who grates on my nerves, and who recently has been assigned to supervise me. So I've been thinking very hard about what a Christian response is to what feels like condescension and disrespect from my perspective. Here's something from the Alban Institute that struck me as relatively practical. Will I be able to follow their suggestions? That's another question.

Six Essential Questions and Choices

We find six choices crucial for every relational interaction. These choices provide the groundwork for the relationship to be a loving relationship. These six choices make it possible for us to relate in loving ways and move toward fulfilling and life-giving relationships:

1. What do I want my relationship with this person to be like?
2. What attitudes and values do I want to honor as I’m with this person?
3. What must I let go of in order to turn towards this person?
4. What is the goodness in this person that I will see and trust?
5. How will I acknowledge to the person the holy goodness that I see in her or him?
6. What will I dare to ask of this person?

Discipline yourself to answer these questions as you prepare to be with people. These choices can enhance already good relationships and improve difficult ones. Practice making these choices with a variety of people. Over time, this process will become habit, done with unconscious competency. These six practices will strengthen all of your relationships and increasingly connect you in deep ways with others.