Could we have some safe space to dialogue here?

The other night I met a woman who wrote a book about spirituality (The book is a series of interviews where she asks: "If I gave you God's phone number, what would you do with it?"), and she said she got two very different sets of responses: there were some very fundamentalist christians who would get in these long tiring arguments with her or tell her she was going to hell, etc., etc., and then there were a lot of people who really did want to learn more about spirituality, and welcomed her book as being very insightful and helpful.

Based on this woman's experiences, I can see why there are so many people who would never think of going to church to talk about spirituality. Because you wouldn't get to talk or experiment or try things on. You'd just have to listen to somebody tell you what to think.

So my question is: why do the super-agressive annoying "evangelists" have to be the only voice for christianity? I'm a christian myself and I don't like it when people come up to me to tell me what I have to do to be saved. Because really, I know they're not going to listen to me unless I say exactly what they want me to say. (Maybe that's an unfair prejudice, but that's been my experience)

Isn't it possible to be christian and still listen to other people with respect?

Maybe even be changed by what you hear?